bad mommy

I would like to think that I've become a pretty good mom over these last 4 months, but recent events might prove otherwise. I have had a few bad mommy moments recently, but if I'm here and Sadie is here to tell about them they couldn't have been that bad, right? Ok, so you already know about me and the nail cutting disaster. These next two instances make the nail cutting look like a walk in the park.

I think most people that know me would say that I'm a pretty laid back person. Although being a calm mother is good for me and my baby, it has almost gotten me into some pretty big trouble over these last few weeks. I'm not ashamed to admit my flaws, (hey, that's what this site is for, right?) but I've come to learn that taking care of another human is NEVER easy. I still consider myself a child and now someone thought I would be capable of taking another person's life into my own hands. Maybe that person should have thought twice. (I think it was my husband and my decision, but again we're stupid kids. What do we know!?!?)

Bad mommy moment number one:

We were on vacation and finally getting into somewhat of a routine. We decided, after a few nights of cooking at home, that we would take our little show on the road for dinner. (***Side note: getting a baby ready to go out anywhere is a production. If you plan on not looking like a train wreck yourself I recommended enlisting the help of others to get you and the baby out the door in a timely manner). Ok, as I was saying...In usual Sadie fashion there was minimal sleeping in the car on the way to the restaurant and as soon as we arrived her eyes were even more wide open. I always try to remain calm when this happens, but the truth is you have no idea what a baby will do at any moment so there's always a little nervous pit in a mommy's stomach. A meltdown could occur at any moment...just breathe.

In order to enjoy any meal out you should always revert to my helpful hint...feed, feed, feed. I'm not the kind of mommy that whips a boob out at a restaurant (no judging for those that do) so I always come prepared with pumped bottles or formula if I don't have milk stored up. It's not that I'm bashful, I just haven't felt the urge to show perfect strangers my hoots. I do have one of those breast feeding covers too, but let's all be honest bottle feeding in public is just so much easier (for me at least).

So, I take Sadie out of her car seat, pump her full of food and gently rock her into sweet slumber. Once she's out there's a sigh of relief and it's time for me to eat! At this point I'm clearly more concerned about putting food in my mouth then strapping her back into her car seat. I figure it will probably disturb her sleep and I'll just do it once we get back to the car. Well, a large dinner and a glass of wine later, we are ready to head home. Sadie slept through the whole meal and the entire trip home. I am so excited that everyone got to enjoy a quiet dinner and most of all that I got to eat without a baby on my lap. We get back to the house and I go to unstrap Sadie from her car seat and realize that I never strapped her in once we got back in the car. We drove our 20 minute drive home from dinner and Sadie was just chillin' on top of all of the car seat straps! I didn't beat myself up too much since thankfully nothing happened, but honestly what kind of sane mommy does that? Obviously one who was hungry and needed some wine. I got over it pretty quickly and bad mommy moment number two made me forget it entirely.

Bad mommy moment number two:

Most people would say managing more than one child is difficult, but I think managing a new baby and a doggy you've had for over three years is much more challenging. Since the weather has been gorgeous in the 'BUS, I've made it our routine (me, Sadie and Rosie) to go for a very long walk everyday. Everyone benefits from this - Rosie gets to run around outside since she's stuck at home these days, Sadie gets to nap because it's pretty much the only place she'll sleep during the day and mommy gets exercise since she gained nearly 40 pounds with Sadie and needs to get rid of it.

Making this all happen on my own isn't always easy. I usually let Rosie out of the house first off her leash while I get the stroller down our three steps up to our house. Rosie's a good dog, but still acts like a puppy. I can usually trust that when I let her out that she'll stand and wait for us at the bottom of the stairs. (Lesson number one: Never again let Rosie out of the house without a leash when manning a massive stroller at the same time). When I opened the door to go outside I assumed Rosie was standing there waiting for us, but I was wrong. I shut the door of the house and locked the stroller by my side (keep in mind that the stroller was definitely LOCKED and about 3 feet from the steps). I look up to make our way down and I notice that Rosie has darted across the street to play with the neighbor's dog. As I am just about to go chasing after Rosie thinking that I could have almost killed my poor pup, I hear a thud thud thud and a whaling baby. "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD," my exact words. Per usual, my mind left worrying about Rosie's whereabouts (poor Rosie) and turned around to find my little Sadie in her stroller at the bottom of the stairs on its side. "I killed my baby!" I thought out loud in a scream. As I ran over to the stroller to make sure Sadie was still alive, Rosie came darting back across the street to make sure everything was ok. Almost killed my dog a second time, but at this point I don't even realize that Rosie could be hit by oncoming traffic. I removed Sadie from the car seat and she immediately stopped crying. As soon as she stopped, I started. I couldn't fathom how such a thing happened. When I turned the stroller upright it was still locked. I was convinced an evil spirit tossed my child down the stairs. It was virtually impossible for her to have fallen from so far away. I must have had a black out moment in the whole happening because I really have no idea how it all went down (no pun intended).

After calming myself down enough to call my husband and my mother (who assured me that everyone has a story like this), I realized that Sadie was totally fine. We all survived a bad mommy moment and I can even laugh about it now. I'm just so grateful for bad mommy moment number one because without it I probably wouldn't have had Sadie strapped in for bad mommy moment number two. Now, my new motto is that I will never make the same mistake twice, but I can almost guarantee that there will be plenty more bad mommy moments. Come on people, no one's perfect:)